Cousins

For the past 3.5 years, most Wednesdays have ended with dinner time, playing, snuggling, tubby time, embracing my inner child and bedtime stories with my sweet nephew, W. This wonderful weekly ritual originally came about because when W was a newborn (during the height of football season) my brother in law had band practice for the Ravens Marching Band on Wednesdays. As my sister was still on maternity leave, I would show up to give her a break while the hubby was at practice.

Of course, I was selfish and had uninterrupted quality time holding my sweet mostly sleeping nephew! How couldn't this be fabulous?? Watching the small milestones on a weekly basis and bonding with this dimpled boy.

As I started with this process of becoming a mom, seeing my W or "schmoopy" was my refuge from life. My time to not think about ovulation or miscarriages but to enjoy the innocence of childhood and see life as simply as he saw it. It never gets old and his sense of humor is starting to develop!!

However, as I sat snuggled with him tonight watching Charlotte's Web, I couldn't help think about how much I wanted to give him a cousin. W. is an only child and has lots of friends at school however I not only desire to have a child for myself but to see how this will impact him. How wonderful would it be to have someone to catch lightening bugs with over the summer or have sleep overs with during spring break?

W. will be 4 in September and of course, it won't be until he is probably 5 that I could/would give birth if my IVF cycle was in September (TBD). This all resonates with me and makes that desire to have a child even stronger.

At least I know by then, W. will be a voracious reader and I can't help but visualize him reading Charlotte's Web to his cousin.